Character Trait: Demanding

To engage your reader, it's important to always show not tell the traits of your characters. The character trait Demanding refers to a person who has high standards and expectations and requires a lot from themselves and others. Demanding individuals have a clear vision of what they want to achieve and are willing to put in the effort and hard work to make it happen. They are not easily satisfied with mediocrity and strive for excellence in everything they do. They may also be perceived as strict or inflexible, but their demanding nature is often driven by a desire to achieve their goals and succeed in their endeavors.

Possible causes of being demanding

You might want to weave these into your character's back story to build a more believable character.

• High standards for themselves and others
• Desire for control or power
• Competitive nature
• Need for attention or validation
• Upbringing or past experiences
• Insecurity or lack of confidence
• Fear of failure or disappointment
• Perfectionism

Behaviors associated with being demanding

You may be able to show your character's trait of demanding by using these.

• Speaking up and asserting oneself in situations where their needs or goals are not being met
• Setting high expectations for oneself and others
• Insisting on quality work or performance from oneself and others
• Holding oneself and others accountable for their actions and responsibilities
• Being persistent in pursuing goals or objectives
• Being direct and clear in communication
• Striving for excellence and pushing oneself to do better

Attitudes associated with being demanding

You may be able to show demanding through their attitudes.

• Prone to taking charge and being in control of situations
• Tendency to be assertive and sometimes aggressive in pursuit of goals
• High expectations of self and others
• Intolerance for mediocrity or laziness
• Willingness to speak up and advocate for what they want
• May come across as stubborn or difficult to work with
• Strong sense of determination and persistence

Thoughts and struggles associated with being demanding

Here are some ideas for things your demanding character may think or struggle with.

• Striving for perfection and becoming upset when mistakes are made
• Struggling to accept criticism or feedback from others
• Constantly feeling unsatisfied with the efforts of others
• Becoming impatient when things don't move quickly enough
• Feeling like they are always right and others are wrong
• Believing that they deserve special treatment or privileges
• Feeling like they are not being respected or valued enough by others
• Struggling to delegate tasks because they believe they can do it better themselves
• Becoming frustrated when things don't go according to their plans

Emotions associated with being demanding

Here are some ideas for emotions your demanding character may experience.

• Impatience
• Intimidation
• Perfectionism
• Arrogance
• Entitlement
• Irritability
• Frustration
• Rigidity
• Control

Facial expressions associated with being demanding

Here are some facial expressions your demanding character may exhibit.

• Stiff body posture
• Furrowed eyebrows
• Raised voice
• Disapproving or critical gaze
• Pursed lips
• Tightened jaw
• Frowning or scowling
• Squinted eyes
• Pointed finger or hand gestures

Body language associated with being demanding

Here is some body language your demanding character may exhibit.

• Eye contact that is intense and unwavering.
• Using expansive gestures to show dominance or authority.
• Leaning forward aggressively.
• Standing tall and straight with a squared-off posture.
• Crossing arms in front of the chest as a sign of disapproval or defiance.
• Pointing with a finger or an object to indicate what they want.
• Clenched fists or tensed muscles to show anger or determination.
• Pacing back and forth in frustration or impatience.
• Using a loud, commanding voice to give orders.

Behaviors associated with being demanding

Here are some behaviors your demanding character may exhibit.

• Speaking up and asserting oneself in situations where their needs or goals are not being met
• Being direct and clear in communication
• Insisting on quality work or performance from oneself and others
• Striving for excellence and pushing oneself to do better
• Setting high expectations for oneself and others
• Being persistent in pursuing goals or objectives
• Holding oneself and others accountable for their actions and responsibilities

Growth and evolution of demanding characters

Here are some ways that your demanding character may grow and evolve over time.

• Recognizing their own flaws and working on self-improvement
• Letting go of control and trusting others to take charge
• Realizing the importance of teamwork and collaboration
• Learning to communicate their needs effectively without being forceful or aggressive
• Learning to prioritize their demands and understand the needs of others
• Understanding the consequences of their demands and learning to compromise
• Developing empathy towards others and understanding their perspectives

Stereotypes of demanding characters to avoid

Try to avoid writing stereotypical demanding character like these examples.

• Avoid making Demanding characters one-dimensional and solely focused on their demands.
• Avoid making them too predictable, as this can make them boring and uninteresting to readers.
• Avoid having them constantly belittle or criticize others without any redeeming qualities or moments of vulnerability.
• Avoid giving them demands that are unrealistic or unreasonable, as this can make them appear irrational or unrelatable.
• Avoid making them excessively aggressive or rude, as this can turn off readers and make the character unlikable.

Negatives of being demanding

Here are some potential negatives of being demanding. Note: These are subjective and some might also be seen as positives depending on the context.

• Can come across as controlling or bossy
• Can make it difficult to compromise or collaborate with others
• May cause stress or burnout for oneself and others
• May create unrealistic expectations for oneself or others
• May alienate others or push them away
• Can lead to conflict or tension in relationships

Positives of being demanding

Here are some potential positives of being demanding. Note: These are subjective and some might also be seen as negatives depending on the context.

• Demanding characters are driven and have high standards for themselves and those around them.
• Demanding characters are often results-driven and can be highly effective in achieving their goals.
• They are often highly organized and efficient, able to manage complex tasks and projects with ease.
• Demanding characters can be highly effective leaders, inspiring others to work hard and strive for excellence.
• They are not afraid to speak their minds and can be assertive in advocating for what they believe in.
• They are often goal-oriented and have a clear vision of what they want to achieve.

Verbal expressions of demanding characters

Here are some potential expressions used by demanding characters.

• "I won't settle for mediocrity."
• "I expect nothing but the best."
• "I want you to push yourself to the limit."
• "I demand excellence from myself and others."
• "I require your utmost effort and dedication."
• "I need you to step up your game."
• "I won't tolerate anything less than perfection."
• "I expect results, not excuses."
• "I demand accountability and responsibility."

Relationships of demanding characters

Here are some ways that being demanding could affect your character's relationships.

• They may have high expectations of others and become frustrated or angry when those expectations are not met.
• Demanding people may struggle with empathy and may not always consider the feelings or perspectives of others.
• Demanding people may have a tendency to be controlling and may try to micromanage those around them.
• They may be prone to criticizing others and may not always give positive feedback or recognition.
• They may have a strong desire for power and may try to assert their dominance over others.
• Demanding people may also struggle with delegation, feeling that they are the only ones who can handle certain tasks or responsibilities.
• Demanding people may have difficulty in maintaining relationships, as their demands and high expectations can be off-putting to others.

Examples from books of characters who are demanding

• Amy Dunne from "Gone Girl" by Gillian Flynn
• Tyler Durden from "Fight Club" by Chuck Palahniuk
• Holden Caulfield from "The Catcher in the Rye" by J.D. Salinger
• Gordon Gekko from "Wall Street" by Stanley Weiser and Oliver Stone
• Ebenezer Scrooge from "A Christmas Carol" by Charles Dickens
• Nurse Ratched from "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" by Ken Kesey
• Miranda Priestly from "The Devil Wears Prada" by Lauren Weisberger
• Ahab from "Moby-Dick" by Herman Melville
• Cathy Ames from "East of Eden" by John Steinbeck

Writing exercises for writing demanding characters

Here are some writing exercises you might try for learning to write demanding characters.

• Imagine a character who is extremely competitive and demands to win at all costs. Write a scene where they face a situation where they cannot win, and how they react to it.
• Create a character who always speaks their mind and demands that others do the same. Write a scene where this character confronts someone who is being dishonest or evasive.
• Create a character who is bossy and demanding of others, but secretly struggles with their own insecurities. Write a scene where they confront their own flaws.
• Write a character who is a perfectionist and demands excellence from themselves and others. Show how this trait affects their personal and professional relationships.